So, after two years of working full time with four children, I am officially becoming a stay at home mom. I am so excited. And terrified.
I like working. I feel like I had a job that I was called to do. It gave me reason to shower, and put on make up. It pushed me out of my sloppy funk. I am scared to go back to being home.
I am worried that I will not be good at it. I see amazing moms all the time around me that I want to strive to be more like them. I see so many things in our home that I need to do that I can’t while I am working. My kids need me home. They are going through some crazy changes.
So I thought, to make things interesting, I would write myself a few things to NOT give up when I stay home this time:
1. Shoes. I love them. I see no reason that I can not have cute shoes as a stay at home mom.
2. Fashion. I want to still be able to be fashionable. When I was home in the fog of post partum depression I was lucky to get out of pjs let alone dress up. I was beyond frumpy. I want more for myself than that.
3. Going out. I am a home body when I am home. I like being there. Unfortunately, it turns me into a bit of a hermit. I want to make a point of exiting my front door several times a week.
4. Makeup. Even a little eyeliner helps me feel pulled together.
5. Days with none of these things. I will be home. It’s okay to occasionally have pajama days. I need to allow myself to be able to relax.
6. Photography. I want to be more intentional about my photography. I will be adding my photos that I take professionally when I am home. No more cell phone camera all the time. I want to crack out my good camera for my family, not just for clients.
Now, I know that these things sound shallow, and in many ways they are. But they are important to me. When I lose sight of taking care of myself, everything around me feels worse. I want to be proud to have people drop into my home. I want to be able to not be humiliated when I run into other people I know.
I want to be able to serve my family in a way that I simply couldn’t when I worked. I want to go to playgrounds and zoos. I want to see them more often. To volunteer at things. To surprise them with hot lunches every so often.
We recently have been walking a road with our oldest who has been diagnosed with severe anxiety, ADHD (a subtype without hyperactivity), and some elements of oppositional defiance. We have been working with a therapist for the past 6 months or so, we have a psychiatrist, and a psychologist on her team also. In two weeks we are meeting with her naturopath to have food sensitivity testing and will be framing our home around that as well. This has been a bumpy walk. She is so smart that it has been overlooked a lot by many teachers. I plan to blog more about this later, but I wanted to share this with those of you who have asked.
I am so happy to be able to be home more to support her also through this.
Please just pray that I am not a miserable failure. I want to be all that I am called to be. I want to build our domestic Church. I want to live my vocation in the way I am being called at this time.
Pray for me as I pray for you always.
In Christ,
CatholicMomma
What big changes, for you and the fam, Peggy! I am excited for you though. And no, those things aren’t shallow. It’s not shallow to want to maintain a sense of self in a life so full of demands from others. In fact I think it’s really important for stay at home parents who are so constantly immersed in ‘others’. And hey! Maybe we’ll get to see each other again 😉
And I’ll be praying for you on your journey with Ariana. We are also pursuing diagnoses for Sawyer, and I strongly suspect ADHD, anxiety, and even Oppositional defiance.
Blessings, Peggy! You’ll rock being at home!
You will do great. Remember the Days are long but the Years are short. I used to hate that phrase until recently.
Hey Catholic Momma!
I think you are a fantastic momma….your family and children always are put first!
After reading this blog you really have a lot on your plate! I really don’t think you will have a problem filling your days at all!
Just get up In The morning and when you get ready just do the normal that you would do getting ready for work and your fashionable catholic momma will still be in tact and running into people on the street will know no difference of wether you are home or not…
Join a gym and put that into your schedule and feel good zone….it’s amazing how great you feel when you do a little cardio…you will be so at peace and then when your are not expecting something God will throw an opportunity your way that you can’t resist!
I hope and pray that your daughter will be ok and now you will beable to help her xo
Blessings to you and your family!
Have fun being at home!